On Tuesday, Republican Sen. Susan Collins of Maine—who is definitely my top pick for chair of the Senate Kindergarten Committee since it seems they need one—decided to do a little show-and-tell on live television.
Collins made an appearance on CNN’s “New Day” to address the recent government shutdown, a potential deal on Dreamers, and her preferred approach to bipartisan discussion, a method that will be familiar to our nation’s pre-school teachers.
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CNN reported on Monday that Collins facilitated bipartisan negotiations to end the shutdown in her office, deploying a “talking stick” during one meeting to keep the conversation on track. It seemed like a fine plan, until, the CNN piece continued, one purported grown-up became so infuriated at an interruption that he (and don’t even try to tell me it was a woman who did this) threw the prop across the room. It missed its mark and chipped an elephant sculpture on Collins’ shelf instead.
Collins was said to have replaced the stick with a small rubber ball which was in turn swapped out for “little basketball.” An unnamed GOP senator went on to assure CNN that despite “a couple close calls,” the discussions continued without further incident. Very good, boys and girls!
Further proof that the most sensible people in Washington know how to treat elected officials—like the babies they are.